I'm not my body - but who am I?

Last week end Mimamai and I had to visit three different hospitals: in Bamberg, Nuremberg and now in Villingen-Schwenningen. I hope, I'm not my body - but who am I?

Again Mimamai and I drove four, five hours to Bath Dryhome in the region of Black Forest. It's my 10th visit there since September.

Now I know, that all my efforts with the old ladies were all in vain. A helicopter had to fly my Old Mom last Saturday in the hospital only 10 kilometres away from her hotel.

Old Mom had to survey several hours of operation, even hard to stand for young people. The next days will show, if Old Mom still can live longer.

I  have visited her four times on three days. Each time she is getting better a bit. I bought her from a Middle Ages market in Villingen a cat. She is so happy and remembers her cat from childhood with the Russian name 'Matuschka.

I'm so touched to see this joy in her old, old eyes, the smile in her faces with all these lines of eight decades.

She is so much more honest. She tries hard to understand every word better, better when she didn't felt sick.

86years Old Mom on Sunday

We ask her to remember the name of her brother's wife. She frankly admits: 'Most of my memory is gone.' She doesn't pretend anymore to know. The severe sickness has helped her to grow her honesty.

Mima has a fixed plan to rule the day: First visit to my Old Mom in the morning, than dinner, second visit has to follow in the afternoon.

But this industrial area 'Villingen-Schwenningen' is separated in two towns. First we found the hospital in Schwenningen. But that was the wrong place.

Mimamai cooks a chamomile tea in her car and fills the tea in a bottle. When we reach the room with the number, finally we find out, that we are on the wrong place. Mima's plan is spoiled. Mima gets furious.

I buy a map, drive to the hospital in Villingen, Mimamai rests in the car. I visit Old Mom. She can sit first time on toilet, to digest again after her operation. Mima sleeps exhausted for a while in her car.

In the afternoon Old Mom is so happy, that Mimamai comes with me to our visit. The women have an easier contact to each other than I ever can have.

The web news are so far, far away. The money crisis brings danger to the world economy. Most spiritual teachers condemn EGOistic behaviour of other people.

I don't know: what is the greed of my EGO, what is the fight for my right? I drink my beer wandering on the street. I try to avoid Mimamai's pressure. I'm happy alone, but I need her to arrange my life better. Even my Old Mom connects deeper and easier to Mimamai than I can reach my Old Mom.

what is the greed of my EGO,
what is the fight for my right?

I can live on my own, but I need the team in our company, to make my money.

Spiritual teachers attack others EGO, but who wants to be attacked? Do people accept these attacks, because they imagine spiritual teachers as 'EGOLESS'. Other spiritual teachers catch customers with flattering.

Wonderful web-sites advertise spiritual success. 'Yahhn', Im tired of these games, I don't understand. For me people are people. A spiritual teacher does a job like everybody else has to earn something for life.

I trust everybody more than spiritual teachers. I don't want any idol! To bring my little life from dust to dawn is enough, more than enough. But please, feel free to seek and search as many spiritual teachers, you can buy! I was a Satsang Hoppers myself looking for something, I never found.

I don't write any lectures. I report facts from my little, from my lousy life with nasty noise on the web. That truth of mine entertains at least: myself!


That's enough for today.

Enough for every day.

I trust everybody more than spiritual teachers.